So, you are in a relationship or married and are very very happy with the circumstances. But are you really? You should be having children, because you clearly can’t be happy without them.
The above is what my friend regularly gets told by friends, family, co-workers and even strangers on the street. Actually (and perhaps sadly) she isn’t the only person I know that has to deal with this. Apparently there was a memo that got circulated that she and all those other unhappy couples and those of us single in our 30s missed that tells them without children they are nothing.
I’ve ranted about this before and as its come up again recently I’ll rant about it again. The first time I wrote about this was after the talented lady behind Rock N Roll Bride wrote this. Having just looked at it again, the blog post is still getting comments 2 years on.
Two years ago I was with my ex, living with two cats and not having kids. Fast forward I am now single, with two cats and still no kids. For those who look at my posts, you’ll know that I’m not adverse to children, I just happened to be with someone who told me we’d discuss it and then ended up cheating on me. You’ll also know that I’m now resigned to the fact that its unlikely I will have kids, but that’s fine – more room for cats.
I’ll paraphrase what I wrote then as it still rings true for me:
Thank you for someone coming forward and having the balls to openly say “Just because I’m married/in a relationship and don’t have kids/want kids (but several cats) doesn’t make me a freak!”
I am constantly being asked by friends and family when will I be popping out small people. Don’t get me wrong I like kids, if I have one fine but am not yet at the stage where I weep at night over my declining egg count. I have two cats who bring me as much joy as my niece brings my sister. Yes, I may end up being a crazy cat woman but that will be my choice.
As someone else mentioned we already live in an overpopulated world with many children living in foster care etc. If I don’t have children then maybe I will consider giving a child in need a family life (obv filled with many many cats). But until that day I will continue to love my life filled with late Friday nights watching films, lazy saturday mornings, spending money on ridiculous shoes I will only wear once and visiting countries/places I want to see. If that make me selfish, then so what – MY UTERUS IS MINE GET OVER IT!
So to all those people who think its your place to question the childless and singles – shut your fucking mouth, your opinion is not needed nor required.
And if we want to hear the teeny tiny patter of little feet, we’ll put shoes on our cats/dogs/ferrets!