May you always remember when the shadows fall, you do not walk alone

May you see God’s light on the path ahead
When the road you walk is dark.
May you always hear,
Even in your hour of sorrow,
The gentle singing of the lark.
When times are hard may hardness
Never turn your heart to stone,
May you always remember
when the shadows fall—
You do not walk alone.

Today I heard some really devastating news about a friend I know from the horror festival I go to. She had taken her own life last week.

I sat on the train as I read the news and sobbed. I couldn’t believe it was happening and now as I write this I still can’t believe its true.  I had to write to make sense of it and quite honestly it doesn’t make any sense whatsoever. I only knew a tiny part of her and her passing has left me feeling like I’ve been punched in the stomach with an iron fist. I can not even start to comprehend how her family feels, and saying sorry for their loss does not seem enough.

I’m so angry about it all. Angry that we hadn’t realised how sad she was, angry that we couldn’t help her and angry that she had no other way out. My heart aches for her family and friends and for her. As someone who suffers from depression and has spiralled down and down to the blackness, it hurts to know she didn’t make it back up to the sunlight.  I just wish I could have done more for you. I’m sorry it came to this for you, it should never have come to this. Not for you and not for anyone.

Steph, I hope you are at peace now.  Know that you were loved, liked and respected by many people not only in the horror community but elsewhere. Rest your beautiful soul surrounded by cats and horror films.

Please don’t suffer alone.

Talk to a friend, family member, work colleague, person sat next to you on the tube, bar tender, the random person who likes your cat pictures on Instagram or even just your local shopkeeper. Just talk to anyone. 

There are many UK based charities for suicide prevention, please do take the time to read their sites or contact them if you feel you’ve reached the end. Your story should not end with suicide;

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