Stewie: Please tell me why you have it?

Brian: I said I don’t want to talk about it.

Stewie: But I want to know. Just tell me, come on.

Brian: No.

Stewie: Come on, please.

Brian: [sighs] I keep it in case… I ever want to commit suicide, ok?

Stewie: Wow. Oh.. oh my God you’re serious, but why Brian?

Brian: You wouldn’t understand. You’re just a kid.

Stewie: Well… I could try.

Brian: I don’t know, sometimes it’s… all too much.

Stewie: What is?

Brian: Life. Everything. Just having the gun here, knowing there’s a way out… it helps.

Stewie: I like you lot. I guess you could say I… really like you. I would… even dare to go a little further, perhaps. I… care a great deal about you. Very great deal. Maybe even… deeper than that. I… I… I love you. I mean, you know, not in like a, “Hey, let’s, you know, let’s have an underpants party,” or whatever grownups do when they’re in love, but I mean, I mean, I love you as one loves another person whom one simply cannot do without.

Brian: Well I… I love you, too, Stewie.

Stewie: You give my life purpose, and maybe, maybe that’s enough. Because that’s just about the greatest gift one friend can give another.