100 posts of nonsense – “Pose your questions to people and you will get countless useless answers.”

So a few posts back I realised I was nearly at 100 posts (jebus I’ve rambled on for 99 posts!) and asked for my 100 for questions and I’d answer them. I tried and failed to get the special Ask plugin working on this blog – it was too hard and I couldn’t be arsed with it when there was cake to eat. I also need to point out how gutted I am that I missed out on doing a 99 problems post for my 99th post. GUTTED!

So anyway, I got 10 and the answers are below. Anymore let me know and I’ll answer them.

1)      – If you could be a T-Rex or a Pterodactylus which would you be and why?

Not going to lie I had to look up what a Pterodactylus is (dumb blonde) and then did a bit of research into both. Okay I googled “who would win in a fight?” and it turns out despite being a winged dinosaur the T-Rex would kick his arse. So then I looked at pros and cons of each;

T-Rex Pros – Big, big teeth, fuck up anything

T-Rex Cons – teeny tiny hands, reminds me of a man at work

Pterodactylu Pros – winged creature, able to fly, cool beak

Pterodactylu Cons – it flies, wouldn’t win in many fights, has to lay eggs

So after all my research I decided that I didn’t want to be either, but rather a dilophasaurusus as I like this scene in Jurassic Park – it has pretty frills and spits acid!

2)      – Have many maltesers can u put in your mouth in one go?

I took this question very seriously, and in the name of science purchased some maltesers to see how many would fit in my gob. Turns out I can fit 15 in my mouth before I almost choke on them. Feel like I need to up my game.

15 bitches!

Photographic proof of my 15 cram!

3)      – Have you ever bitten someone?

When I was younger I’m pretty sure I must have bitten my sister. As an adult, no. I’ve not even punched anyone properly. I have kicked people in the balls though. That was fun.

4)      – Have you ever been in the newspaper? If yes, why

I was in the newspaper as a small child. I was an angel in the playgroup nativity. I had massive hair, and a stupid grin. Not much has changed.

5)      – Which one of the teenage mutant hero turtles would you be and why!?!

I have to say I was never a huge turtles fan, as it freaked me out they lived in the sewer with a giant rat. Don’t get me started on the whole human/turtle bestiality either! I just remember I was always the shit one whenever I had to play turtles with my mum’s friends son, so I don’t want to be that one. Any of the others would be fine.

6)      – What is your favourite swear word?

Cunt. I love the word cunt.

7)      – What is worse; Tie Dye or wearing Jodhpurs?

Hmmm, tough one. I would say jodhpurs. Tie Dye can look okay sometimes, and also it means you can look like a hippy and not give a shit about anything.

8)      – If you owned a horse what would you call it?

Mr Frou Frou la Biscuit Diamond Horse

9)      – Is crimped hair a sin or a win?

Sin. Big fat sin. It ain’t coming back into fashion, it died in the 80s kids, let it rest.

10)   –  Who is your favourite, Emma or Louise?

My favourite is chips. Always chips.

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